random thoughts... all free today

another page - hot damn i'm on a roll

Just finished up this one:

I am totally in love with this page.  The bright colors mixed with the black just make me soooo very happy.  This is lifted from the same LO as the last one i did and posted.  Original LO is by Laura Vegas which you can find by clicking here.  You can totally see how versatile a lift can be.  The first LO i did was very mellow and everything lined up straight and orderly.  The page I just completed, I offset most of the elements to make it more fun and reflect the subject.  there is NOTHING mellow, lined-up or calm about jackson.  :)

Products:

Pattern Paper: BasicGrey - Offbeat

Cardstock: BoBunny (teal) Bazzill (dark brown)

Cardstock alphas and diecut shapes: BasicGrey

decorative brad: BasicGrey

starburst rubon: BasicGrey

black plastic alphas: The Paper Studio (Spare Parts)

buttons: BasicGrey

Transparent star: Colorbok

rubon stars: American Crafts

Chipboard star: unknown

Ink: Top Boss

Embossing powder: Zing (American Crafts)

Black pen: Martha Stewart

Embroidery thread: DMC

i *might* be able to get another one tonight or tomorrow, depending on where the family wants to drag me.  I think we're looking into going to the shooting range so we'll see.

happy saturday,

~h

new stuff!

Worked on this off and on yesterday.  Supposed to be a 15 min page but it took me closer to 3 hours.  I just kept picking and picking and picking and finally considered it "done" to my satisfaction.  It's a lift from the May/June 2010 Creating Keepsakes mag, page 122.  Original LO is by Laura Vegas ("The Fam").  I plan on doing another one using this same format for photos I have of jack-jack.  Hopefully it won't take me 3 hours the next time around but knowing me..it will.

Up a Tree (lifted from Laura Vegas May/June 2010 CK "The Fam"):

 

While taking photos of this page to upload you'll notice I had a little company.  To the very right of the photo is my foot and Jetter's paw.  Notice he also NEEDS TO BE touching me in some way, shape or form.  He's ALWAYS right next to you no matter WHERE you go.  If you go to the bathroom he accompanies you...sitting patiently outside the door waiting for you.  Yes...he's a little bit NEEDY.  I had actually made him move a bit because the shadow of his nose was casting on the photo.  When i asked him to move he ended up resting his chin ON the page.  :sigh:  Finally got him to move *just enough* to where I could get a good shot of the page with no shadows or dog parts on it.  Just a daily something in my life that I didn't realize I captured until I opened the photo on my computer.  Sweet Jetter-boy.  And in the event Casey reads this - YES...he *is* YOUR DOG.

 

Also, had a bit of an accident when I was hunting for my brown brads last night.  Opened the darned contained with the lid facing DOWN.  I have since labeled all of my clear containers with "TOP!" on their tops so i don't do this again:

 

I started to sort them all by color/type last night but got tired of picking through them and left it for this morning.  I am SOOOOO not looking forward to sorting these little suckers.  HUGE pain in the ass.

That's all for a Thursday morning.  Hopefully will create another page today!

~h
  

What I did this weekend (crafty wise)

Lookee here:

 Created this page using this sketch here:

 

You can also find more goodies here at Page Maps.  This sketch is in the April PageMaps on the left side navigation bar.  LOTS of good stuff there, I highly recommend! 

I have to thank Adele over at Club CK for posting the sketch to the MB otherwise I never would have seen it.  This is the first LO I've created in MONTHS....MONTHS AND MONTHS. I'm working on another one that is supposed to be a "15 mins LO" however, me and my picky self....i have 30 mins already vested and nothing has even been stuck down yet.  It'll turn into an hour long LO...trust me.  It's like a scab....i can't stop from picking at it. 

Off to do work!

~h  

Overheard in my living room this morning

Casey:  So I guess I won't be home until after 6 again tonight!  See you guys later...

Backstory:  Casey has been out of work for nearly a year now (he was laid off May 1, 2009)  Yesterday he went to work with our neighbor and good friend.  He's a handy man for a guy here in the valley that owns a lot of rental properties.  He stays busy and works long days including weekends if necessary.  He has been very busy and needed an extra set of hands.  Enter Casey.  He needs a job and neighbor needs help.  Perfect combination.

I just marveled at his comment this morning.  I suppose being out of work for that long makes you lose sight of what life was like before when you worked all day, every day.  I'm off work today.  Was supposed to go on a trip with my good friend but things got complicated and I had to cancel.  BUT i kept the days off i had requested at work.  It was interesting that this morning Casey was off to work while I'm home alone today by myself.  Strange turn of events.  :)

I have some chores to take care of and errands to run then it's play time for me for the rest of the day.  Hopefully get some scrapbooking done if not a Mother's Day project or two.

Happy Hump Day!

~h

Overheard in my backyard yesterday afternoon

Jackson: Hahahahaaaaa brother! I just popped Rico!!! HAAAHAHAHAHAAA!!!

Connor: That wasn't Rico. That was his twin sister Nicolette.

Jackson: Oh. Nicolette?

Backstory: They were playing with water balloons in the back yard while I grilled chicken for dinner. Connor named his water balloons apparently. What possessed him to not only name, but to explain to his 7YO brother that he named them AND come up with such creative names? No clue. It sure made me giggle though. :)

Cricut, SCAL and a giveaway!

Ok so I don't have a cricut or SCAL (even though amanda is making me REALLY REALLY kinda want both) but she does some pretty amazing things with them and her tutorial vids are very informative.

She's giving away one very very cool kit HERE.  Jump on over and read all about it.  How to win, how you can win in different ways.  And while you're there check out her tutorials and very handy craftsmanship on that camera strap cover (that i covet so very much).  Thanks Amanda for a very cool chance to win something awesome and sharing your skills with the WWW!

~h

DMB isn't coming to AZ this summer. :( I'm wayyyyy bummed. It's always the highlight of my year and now i'll have nothing to look forward to. BUT the Warehouse Fan Club Membership packages will be mailing in the next few weeks and THAT will be cool. Still doesn't make up for the fact that i will miss ANOTHER DMB show but whatever....you can't always get what you want.  Look at THIS gorgeous photo though.  made me happy and i just wanted to share.


~h

Shimmerz is up to something awesome!

Check out there site http://shimmerzpaints.blogspot.com/ and see what all the hoopla is about!

what gets me through

Everyday all day my life is uncertain.  Some days are great and i feel almost "normal" again and others it kicks me straight in the ass and once i fall down kicks me again for good measure.  The past week has had really good days and really bad days.  The highest of the highs and the lowest of the lows.  Lately I find myself with the following song stuck in my head and didn't realize i was singing it often until the other day.  It truly is my inspiration and in some small way, makes me feel better....comforted.  I can relate to the entire song but the line that gets me every time is in the chorus "You get mad you get strong, wipe your hands shake it off, then you stand..."   I know....makes me sound like a very angry person and sometimes I *am* a very angry person.  It vascillates from being mad at him to being mad at myself to being mad at the situation.  Never can tell, each day is different.  But MOST days I do indeed wipe my hands, shake it off then i stand.  It's still very hard and emotional and definitely not where i saw my life going but it is what it is. 

Stand - Rascal Flats

You feel like a candle in a hurricane
Just like a picture with a broken frame
Alone and helpless
Like you've lost your fight
But you'll be alright, you'll be alright

[Chorus:]
Cause when push comes to shove
You taste what you're made of
You might bend, till you break
Cause its all you can take
On your knees you look up
Decide you've had enough
You get mad you get strong
Wipe your hands shake it off
Then you Stand

Life's like a novel
With the end ripped out
The edge of a canyon
With only one way down
Take what you're given before its gone
Start holding on, keep holding on

[Repeat Chorus]

Everytime you get up
And get back in the race
One more small piece of you
Starts to fall into place
Oh

[Repeat Chorus]

the next step

my dad was right.  i woudn't know what the next step was until i got myself together.  well i'm together (mostly) and now i'm at my second step.

i'm taking care of my priorities which is immediately taking care of me.  come monday it will be taking care of the boys but for right now they are with norm camping and it's just me to worry about. 

i woke up this morning to my phone ringing and talked with my dad.  for the first time in the last few days i didn't start to immediately cry.  i didn't even cry when i was on the phone with him.  i dunno if i'm out of tears or if i'm learning how to wear the situation as each day passes.  maybe a little bit of both.

this second step is pretty basic and simple and right now i can handle that.  take care of me and my babies and keep us moving forward and together.  in the days to come i have no doubt i will stumble and maybe even fall but for now i just focus on what's directly in front of me and i'll make it through.

anyone that knows me well knows that in situations where i don't know what is going to happen i go a little crazy.  i like to be in control, i like to plan things out, i like to ready my expectations.  right now i have no earthly clue what the future holds for me, for casey, for the boys, for our future.  i can't control it, i can't predict it and right now i can do absolutely nothing about it.  that has been tremendously hard for me to accept but i have.  i have said my piece, told him how i feel and said my apologies.  he knows that i want to try to make this work, knows that i love him and want him to come back but reminding him of that every chance i got was smothering him and hurting him and while i feel the need to talk he wants to forget for a little while.  we both need a break and this is probably the extreme of a break but it's necessary.  so i'm working very hard on giving him space.  there's nothing more i can do or say to change his mind.  i'm letting go and i'm letting God and whatever happens happens and i just have to learn to be ok with that.  the waiting truly is the hardest part.

i believe i have already kind of given up in some small way that he will come back.  tried to prepare my mind for that reality because it's a very good possibility that might happen.  he's back home where he's always wanted to be, among family and friends and where he felt he belonged all this time.  it's a fight i can't win and i knew i never could win. 

that stupid counselor was right...he WILL go back to Dallas...it's just a matter of when.  :(  at the time i told that counselor she was full of shit...he loved me and the kids and said he was here because of us.  she told me it didn't matter, it was his home and if he kept bringing it up and constantly kept going back to visit and making that more of a priority it was only a matter of time before he would go back for good.  if he didn't make the decision that we, him and me and the boys were his home, his priority, then i could count on it to happen.  Dallas is his mistress and he keeps going back to her no matter how much he loves me. she is always waiting in the wings ready for things to fail so she can take him away from me forever.  well i'd say i've achieved an "A" in failure and he's back with her now, quite possibly for good.  it's a very tough pill to swallow and i'm still trying to accept it.

so i'm waiting, albeit impatiently, but with the knowledge that i can't do anything but wait.  wait on him, even though i've been waiting on him for nearly 3 years now.  wait for him to decide, for him to keep the ball or throw it back to me.  i'm trying very hard not to be a defeatest and think that this is over, trying to leverage that with the hope that it's not.  expecting the best but preparing for the worst.  what a paradox.

i'm off to start my saturday.  i'm NOT gonna spend all day in my jammies being a bum.  i have things to do, i have ME to take care of and lately that's a full time job.

peace,

~h